Story concept brainstorms

[ai]

I have a rather good start for a story, however. I'm not going to tell it.

[your_errors]

Since the nexuiz weapons are nothing near a nuke there is no way you would be able to take over the galaxy with them because you would also need to take over earth... and nukes would irradiate you with x and gamma rays first. You could take over the rest of the galaxy minus earth though... aslong as it's a dead universe (sans earth).

If I understood well (sorry for my english) you said that weapons cause so much damage that could destroy the earth and humans life. That' s true. For this reason history tells that human beings are extinct and this is now a game, a sport, played by aliens Edit: Human beings shapes are only reproduced. In the long version I said they eat "matter from volcanic fumes or energy extracted from plasma" and in this short version I wrote "technologically advanced" to suggest they have no problems about nuclear. Consider when they landed the planet was already "inhospitable" and radioactive.
Edit: Same for weapons resistance to nuclear and rays. Weapons are an hypothetical reconstruction of those used by "ancient" human beings. But the materials are not what we used now. The story is set "in our far future".

Storylines are not easy to make non-crappy.

That's sure : ) This isn't (and will not be) a masterpiece of literature. But the reason for "trying" to create a story is that a story can be told and disseminated better than a tutorial. It's an excuse for introduce some information about game and to give copy/paste material to the journalists who write more about other games that offer written materials ready made. I explained this (and other reasons) better in my first post here.

Anyway is a good idea to talk better about their damage and radioactive resistance (it's the same reason that permit them to jump on explosions). Thanks : )


Edit: Note.

Earth life living near radioactive metals.
Geobacter metallireducens. Has the ability to oxidize organic compounds and metals, including iron, radioactive metals and petroleum compounds into environmentally benign carbon dioxide while using iron oxide or other available metals as electron acceptor.

Subsea life living near volcanoes eating rocks.
Pyrococcus furiosus is an extremophilic species of Archaea. It is notable for having an optimum growth temperature of 100°C (a temperature which would destroy most living organisms), and for being one of the few organisms identified as possessing enzymes containing tungsten, an element rarely found in biological molecules.

[your_errors]

Edit: Another way to tell a story could be to describe what they do without explain who they are.

e.g.
On abandoned space stations,
In ruined buildings
On desolate asteroids,
In their far arenas

They jump pushed by their lasers
boosted by their own explosions
launching their hooks...

and so on.


What about this kind of narration? Not a back-story but an emphatic description of the game.

[The mysterious Mr. 4m]

"All that's left are remains. The few of us that survived are now scattered throughout the galaxy, traveling on artificial planets. No one knows what happened and some try to find out, but most don't care. They just try to stay alive...."

[your_errors]

"All that's left are remains. The few of us that survived are now scattered throughout the galaxy, traveling on artificial planets. No one knows what happened and some try to find out, but most don't care. They just try to stay alive...."

Very impressive and exciting But this kind of narration presupposes they must fight against natural barriers, people from other planets (various people), to conquer a territory, and other difficulties to survive. It also assumes that the problems change, that the time spent and a progression of the story is possible; e.g. I fought against those people and I won, so now another people (with different shapes).
But these other elements are not present in the game. The base of the game is: same people fought repeatedly in different places. Just as happens in sports: [edit] teams can change only their internal members but their "appearances" remain the same (teams colors, symbols and so on), rules do not (or changes few things) but really only circuits changes. The only alternatively is change the discipline (here disciplines are CTF, TDM, DM, and so on) [end edit].
About characters consider right now there are humans shapes, alien shapes and robot shapes. But in online mode you can see all together in the same team, and not humans vs robots. robots vs aliens and so on.
So we should search between those things we do so repetitive. Because that reason I tell about a cultural event becoming an Interplanetary sport, which is a reproduction of past events and not a real event. "Reproduction" otherwise the blood and the flesh you see and your respawn (reborn) can't be explained (really I'd prefer to see only my armor destroyed and not my blood ). But any other suggest is welcome.

[Shoe]

I really like that. It's so simple but implies a lot. It'd be nice if we had some sort of one-off intro video that started with that and then went into gameplay vids of shit getting wrecked.

I'm doubtful that would happen because of how it would inflate download size, but it'd be neat if it were for like a packaged game.

[your_errors]

I really like that. It's so simple but implies a lot. It'd be nice if we had some sort of one-off intro video that started with that and then went into gameplay vids of shit getting wrecked.

thanks. I was thinking about some little modify to explain a little better something (few words). Anyway the length will depend on the length of a possible video.
With "one-off intro" you mean a sort of black screen with only a voice narrating first part of the story? If yes could be exciting. If no I misunderstood : (

Edit:
Also I will try to shorten the backstory (Especially the period dedicated to the spaceship incident) and describe some 'more the game.

I'm doubtful that would happen because of how it would inflate download size, but it'd be neat if it were for like a packaged game.

I'm not thinking about this problem because all this is unofficial and so we are free to imaging (until not offensive for authors will and game clearly)

[your_errors]

Added:

- Some more explanation about nuclear and no-atmosphere resistance of the players. See also previous notes (Posted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 2:00 am).
- A "reason" to remember the ancient people.
- More game play info.
- The two parts (story and game description) have their own increasing/decreasing sentences.


Doubt.
Now the periods have equal number of sentences (4). Is an odd number better to speed up the rhythm? anyway could depend on a possible video.

Edit. Maybe too long now. To be edited again.


As before your corrections to my English are welcome.


A backstory

Many millennia ago, in our far future
on a uninhabited and inhospitable world
is precipitating a spaceship-school;
But many little children will survive.

Sharing the planet's resources, radioactive rocks and volcanic matter,
over the decades they grew; Over the centuries they forgot their origins;
Over the millennia they thrive, meeting people from other worlds and
becoming a peaceful and tecnologically advanced interplanetary community.

Many centuries* ago, they found an ancient subsea building and degraded documents
talking about a devastating nuclear and bacteriological war, occurred millions of years before.
Beliving the owner was one of their ancestors they thought had discovered because they were left alone.
Really it was what remained of another people: The human beings; They were on our Earth.

In order to remember "their fathers" and their horrible mistakes,
they established the Origins Week, a gaming and events time,
culminating in the Nex Day: The end of life representatives* games.
Quickly their spectacular representations became famous all over the cosmos.

There, as on other planets, became a real sport divided in various disciplines;
Using abandoned space stations, ruined buildings, dedicated arenas
and any available uninhabited place, professional single players, teams and clans
challenge in Capture the Flag, Death Match, Key Hunt, Race and others modes.

Using suits simulating "their ancestors" shapes too and ancient weapons resistant armors,
they jump boosted by explosions, flying in the air faster than ancient rockets,
launching their hooks, or climbing the walls using their lasers, trying to avoid opponets fire.
As in the ancient war no chance for a long life, but use it for the best, for remember, scoring for another bit of life.

Every year on that planet, during the longest night of winter,
subscriptions to Nexuiz games* are open and free for all.
But started one second ago, in a far future we will never know,
be sure someone is already playing!

End


Notes

* Instead of repeating the "centuries" word, I'd prefer to create an alien time-space term. I'd like to use the words used
in NetRadiant to indicate one or several units of space and merge with words that indicate the time. Do you know what NetRadiant use?

* Is the right word "representatives" or "representing"? (I need to sleep...)

[Edit] * Would be incorrect to say "Nexuiz Games". But this could create confusion and be mistaken for the name of the game. Other ways?

Cya

[take_this_cup_of_poison]

"All that's left are remains. The few of us that survived are now scattered throughout the galaxy, traveling on artificial planets. No one knows what happened and some try to find out, but most don't care. They just try to stay alive...."

I like this "story" the best. The others are too... childish I guess... limiting... not serious and "explain" too much (and I don't like the "it's just a recreation of past events... oh and delete blood and gore please devs please I don't like my flesh being destroyed beeggggggg" notion (hint: it's a game, you aren't the avatar)). If somepeople don't want blood or gibs there are cvars to set to disable it.

[your_errors]

oh and delete blood and gore please devs please I don't like my flesh being destroyed beeggggggg" notion (hint: it's a game, you aren't the avatar)). If somepeople don't want blood or gibs there are cvars to set to disable it.

I have not asked that and I am not going to ask. This issue is debated in other dedicated topic and, not only cvars, some of these changes are already available for download (as you probably know).

Regard to the "too much explanations", I have due somewhat longer 'just because you had not realized (see your own previous reply in which you talk of nuke, nuclear and x-ray resistance).
However I will have to shorten it for different reasons (rhythm first of all).

Edit:
The story does not tells this is a representation of past events. Tells instead it was "born" as a representation but "soon became a sport", a game. Then the player "really" plays, is not an actor who represents something.